1. I was just a kid on the coast of Spain.
When a Moor with a sword cleft my palate in twain.
I know I ain't as good as the hammer,
Cause rappin with my homies,
I always stammer.
2. Some like it cold,
I like it hot.
I dream of planes,
When I dream alot.
3. Stolen formulas,
For cubics no less,
Got the Tart drunk,
And he did the rest.
4. 1 3 3 1,
Is from my fourth row,
It makes the most lovely,
Of triangles you know.
5. When I see an area,
I burst it apart,
With my rectangle ray,
Into a real work of art.
The integral produced,
By the sum that I see,
You too can get,
Using infinity.
6. I ran from the plague,
I hid on the farm,
The math I produced,
Had infinitesimal charm.
7. They say that I borrowed,
From that English dude,
To say that I stole,
Would have been too rude.
8. Until there was me,
Newton you see,
Had no leg to stand,
That [[Delta]]x man.
9. I was burned at the stake,
Math didn't help me,
Though I did more than all,
before 1000 A.D.
10. So what if lines are not really straight,
I wrote what I thought,
In my fifth postulate.
11. My followers and I,
Will always love [[pi]],
Over numbers we mull,
But never irrational.
12. I once had a mule,
Who thought me a fool.
He rolled on his back,
To lighten his sack.
He made me so mad,
Toward him I did lunge,
And loaded his back,
With a 30 ton sponge.
13. The great pyramid,
Was no problem for me,
I used the suns rays,
Similarly.
14. My father and mother,
Of no earthly renown,
I don't know what happened,
I'm the smartest in town.
I coaxed out the letters,
Before I was three,
I read to mom,
Before she read to me.
My dad kept the books,
His math was so poor,
I found his mistakes,
Before I was four.
A canal swallowed me,
Before I was five.
Your math book is thick,
I was fished out alive.
I dipped a gal's hair,
In ink, it was fun.
I guess I was mean,
Like Atilla the Hun.
I was punished by adding,
Some numbers you see.
It took twenty seconds,
No challenge for me.
When death's icy fingers,
I felt on my throat,
I fought like a tiger,
But no more I wrote.
I'm number one,
And don't you forget,
I've forgotten more math,
Than you have learned yet.
So next time you see,
Some numbers to add,
Think "little boy",
Who once had been bad.
15. A big Roman dude, with a big Roman sword,
Burst in my room, like the Mongolian horde.
His big stinky feet, he drug on my floor,
And ruined my triangles, the big ugly boar.
I jumped to my feet, I poked at his ribs,
I fussed in his face, I spoke some ad libs.
He poked right back, only he used some steel,
Now I'm six feet down, And Caesar is ill.
16. A disagreement we had,
Our nerves it did tax.
So we took our solutions,
And to Leibnitz did fax.
The pope he did seal,
The envelope with wax.
No one dared open,
The penalty was max.
17. Calculations for me,
Were just like a breath,
Just do it I said,
And I did so till death.
Though I was blind,
With math I was hot,
I could see in my mind,
What my eyeballs could not.
18. I thought I could wait,
My drinking glass I nursed,
By the time I got up,
My bladder had burst.
19. The notes of old Tyco,
Were just gathering dust,
I found out for planets,
The ellipse was a must.
20. Left by Napoleon,
To die on the field,
A prisoner of Russians,
I was not killed.
I saw the sun's rays,
Project through the bars,
And now all of you,
Watch movie stars.
24. My French blood was hot,
My pistol aim was not.
So I extended those fields,
Before I was killed.
25. I've lived on the web,
I'm tired it is true.
You've seen all I have,
And now I am through.
Answers:
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KEPLERCARDANRIEMANNTHEBERNOULLIBROS